Today, I am thrilled to introduce a truly inspiring guest, from Johannesburg, South Africa—Marcus Malesela!
Marcus embodies a philosophy that resonates with timeless wisdom, echoing the words of the great Marcus Aurelius: “Humility is the foundation of all virtues, for it allows us to approach every situation with an open mind and a willingness to learn from others.” His life and work remind us that by letting go of prejudices and biases, we unlock the true potential for growth, understanding, and transformation.
As the founder and editor of The Human In You, Marcus thrives to empower individuals to lead more mindful and fulfilling lives. His insightful articles are a testament to his lifelong passion for exploring human psychology and nurturing the mindset and spirit needed to thrive in a complex world.
I am honored to have him here today to share his journey, wisdom, and the powerful stories behind his mission.
Indiana: Self-doubt—such a simple phrase, yet it holds so much power over our lives. Marcus, I’m so glad to have you here today to unpack this topic with me. Let’s start with the big question: why do you think self-doubt has such a strong grip on us, even when we know, deep down, what we’re capable of?
Marcus: Thank you, Indiana. It’s a pleasure to be here. Self-doubt is a complex emotion, rooted in both our biology and our experiences. It often stems from a fear of failure, rejection, or not meeting expectations—whether our own or those imposed by others. But what makes it so universal is that it taps into our vulnerability, which, ironically, is also where our greatest strength lies.
Indiana: That’s such a powerful perspective. So, in your experience, how can we begin to shift our relationship with self-doubt, turning it from an obstacle into something that propels us forward?
Marcus: It starts with humility and self-awareness, as Marcus Aurelius said: “Humility is the foundation of all virtues.” When we accept doubt as part of our journey rather than a permanent roadblock, we open the door to growth. It’s about reframing self-doubt—not as a sign of weakness, but as an invitation to learn, adapt, and ultimately, grow stronger.
Indiana: I love that—reframing self-doubt as an invitation to grow. Let’s dive deeper into that… I think many people can relate to the experience of questioning their worth, even when outwardly everything seems to be going well. How have you navigated those feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt?
Marcus: We need to acknowledge that our strength and endurance differ from person to person. It’s important to realize that facing challenges doesn’t mean we’re weak or flawed. We’re all individuals trying to navigate the chaos of life, just like those who came before us. Therefore, we should appreciate ourselves for persevering and moving forward, regardless of how difficult our circumstances may be. As I grew older, I promised myself that I wouldn’t let this darkness dictate my future. Even back then, I had a hidden part of me that was always scared of being exposed or confronted. I sought refuge in obscure places to hide away. I later came to the realization that I needed to confront my personal struggles in different, more productive ways. Instead of drowning my sorrows in excessive drinking and getting into unnecessary fights at taverns, which only served as temporary distractions, I now understand that I was merely avoiding facing my true essence.
Indiana: That’s such a powerful realization, Marcus—acknowledging your struggles and choosing to confront them in a healthier, more productive way. It’s inspiring to hear how you’ve worked to break free from those old patterns and embrace a more honest relationship with yourself. But for those who, like you, struggle with the feeling of being perpetually inadequate, what steps would you suggest to help them cope and start to rebuild their sense of worth? How can they begin to move away from avoidance and toward genuine healing?
Marcus: I think the first step is recognizing and accepting those feelings of inadequacy for what they are—a part of our human experience, not a reflection of our true worth. It’s easy to get caught in a cycle of self-criticism, especially when we’re high achievers or deeply reflective. I know this because I’ve been there—reaching milestones and still questioning if they were truly meaningful or if I was just seeking validation from others.
Over the past few years, I’ve reached some significant milestones and experienced a whirlwind of accomplishments. Yet, amidst these successes, I’ve developed a habit of reflecting on my journey, often finding myself questioning the choices I’ve made. There are moments when I delve into a critical analysis of my work, pondering whether my motivation is rooted in genuine passion if I am seeking validation from others, or perhaps even attempting to inflate my own sense of self-importance.
Feeling perpetually inadequate, regardless of the effort put in, is undeniably one of the most disheartening emotions. The loss of self-assurance gradually erodes one’s sense of value, eventually prompting doubts to emerge. I must confess, I have been experiencing this distressing state for quite some time now. It seems that no matter what I undertook, my efforts fall short. This internal belief that something is inherently wrong filled me with saddness.
Indiana: Marcus, that feeling of perpetual inadequacy you’ve described is something so many people can relate to, yet it’s rarely spoken about with such honesty. When that internal belief—that something is inherently wrong—took hold of you, what was the turning point? Was there a specific moment or realization that helped you snap out of that cycle of self-doubt and begin reclaiming your sense of worth? How did you find the strength to challenge and rewrite that narrative?
Marcus: That’s a thoughtful question, Indiana, and one I’ve spent a great deal of time reflecting on. The turning point for me came when I realized that doubt is not inherently a weakness—it’s a tool. It’s important to draw a distinction here: doubt is not the same as prejudice. Prejudice is a closed door, a refusal to engage or question, while doubt is an open window—it allows us to breathe, reassess, and see things from a new perspective.
For a long time, my self-doubt felt overwhelming, almost paralyzing. But I began to ask myself: What if this doubt isn’t here to defeat me, but to teach me? That shift in perspective was pivotal. I started viewing doubt as a natural part of growth, not as a sign that something was wrong with me. It’s easy to equate certainty with confidence, but in reality, unwavering certainty often signals that we’ve stopped questioning—and when we stop questioning, we stop growing.
To break the cycle of self-doubt, I learned to embrace it with curiosity rather than fear. Whenever I felt inadequate, I would pause and ask myself, What is this doubt trying to show me? Instead of dismissing it or letting it consume me, I investigated: Was my belief rooted in truth, or was it shaped by external expectations or unexamined fears?
Through this process, I began to trust my ability to navigate the unknown, to question without judgment, and to accept that uncertainty is part of being human. The key for me was understanding that doubt isn’t the enemy—it’s a spark. When approached with humility and purpose, it can ignite growth and push us toward becoming stronger and more authentic versions of ourselves.
One of the most comforting realizations during this journey was remembering that God has designed each of us with purpose and potential. Even in moments of doubt, knowing that a higher power is guiding us and helping us rise above challenges gave me the strength to keep moving forward. This sense of divine purpose reminds me that my value doesn’t come from fleeting successes or external validation—it’s intrinsic, a gift from God.
The greatest competition you face is often within yourself. There’s a constant internal tug-of-war between who you are now and who you aspire to be. Embrace the journey, as self-doubt can be overcome, allowing you to unlock the potential you know is within you. We live in a competitive world, yet the reality is you are ultimately running your own race.
Indiana: Marcus, you have such a poetic way with words—it’s like you weave them into a symphony that speaks directly to the soul. Please, indulge me and our audience: could you share a piece of your poetic wisdom that encapsulates your journey through self-doubt and toward purpose?
Marcus: Thank you, Indiana, for such kind words. It would be my honor to share. Here’s a piece that reflects my journey through the shadows of self-doubt and into the light of purpose:
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As the sun sank below the horizon. Casting an ethereal glow across the sky. A storm of darkness brewed within me. Determined to vanquish the shadows that haunted my soul, I clenched my fists, summoning the strength of a thousand warriors.
I exhaled the toxic fumes of doubt and regret. Watching as they disintegrated into the abyss. My mind became a battleground. Thoughts crashing like thunder, While lightning illuminated the path to my salvation.
The shackles of negativity rattled. Their grip weakening as I confronted my inner demons head-on. Rising from the depths of despair, I trembled and sweat. A phoenix ascending from the ashes. Each negative thought was expelled. A void opened, hungry for the positive energy beckoning from my being.
With open arms, I welcomed it. Feeling its warmth seep into my veins, Igniting a fire that burned brighter than the stars.
In this newfound clarity. I witnessed the breathtaking beauty that had long remained dormant. Patiently waiting for the moment of awakening. It felt as if the universe itself had conspired on my behalf. Orchestrating a magnificent symphony of serendipitous encounters. And unexpected blessings that flowed into my life like a gentle stream.
The shadows of my past— Once filled with self-imposed limitations—began to dissolve, And I found myself soaring through the expansive heavens. Emerging as a radiant beacon of hope and inspiration.
With each passing moment. I enveloped myself in an undeniable aura of positivity. Leaving behind a dazzling trail of sparks. That ignited the spirits of those fortunate enough to cross my path.
No longer did I see myself as a mere victim of life’s circumstances. I had transformed into the architect of my own destiny. With intention and unwavering belief. I made every decision. Crafting my reality into a masterpiece of my own design.
The world beneath my feet trembled in response to my newfound confidence. As if acknowledging the undeniable strength of my indomitable spirit. I discovered a profound truth: When you actively clear away the negative energies that clutter your life, You create a vast, open space for the positive forces that are meant to flourish.
In that powerful realization. I stood tall and resolute, truly a force of nature, ready to conquer the world with a heart ablaze with passion and a soul soaring free.
Every challenge I faced. Became an opportunity for growth, And with each step I took, I felt the exhilarating rush of possibility fueling my journey forward.
Marcus Malesela
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Indiana: Marcus, your words are nothing short of breathtaking—a poetic journey that captures the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of transcending self-doubt. Thank you for sharing such profound beauty and wisdom with us today.
To our audience, I hope these words have ignited a spark within you, just as they have for me. But this is only the beginning. Stay tuned for Part 2, where Marcus and I will dive even deeper into the intricacies of the journey to becoming the best version of ourselves. You won’t want to miss it! Until next time, take care and keep moving forward with courage and intention.
PS: Share your knowledge, insights, and wisdom through interactive storytelling. Have a meaningful conversation with Indiana the host of the Reed Manga Series. DM to become the next Honored Guest.
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